First Post Interview

For my first post I decided to give myself a little Q&A. I'll be asking the Q's and answering the A's just so no one gets confused.

Disclaimer: This post contains what some would call potty words and may not be suitable for all readers.

Thank you so much for inviting me to sit at your desk for this interview Ashley. So, I'll just start with the question that's on everyones mind. Why did you start a blog?

Well Ashley, thanks to you for coming, and you could do me a favor and suck in a little more while you're here. Not that I'm trying to be rude, its just that I've heard rumors that chunky receptionists aren't pleasing to the eye here, and they might get their hours cut back, or even worse "laid off".

Oh I guess I'll have to bust out some cardio and some crunches before the next interview then, and since we're being honest about appearances right now, your hair looks like crap.

Well for your information, I woke up late. But back to the question. I felt it was only fair that since a great portion of my work day is spent blog stalking I might as well try to contribute something to the blogging community and it's also a nice way to journal.

Fascinating... So why did you choose blackchicken-honey for your url?

When I was little and I loved pot roast, but I thought it was black chicken, so I gave that as a middle name to myself. I was Ashley Black Chicken Lyn Anderson. And Honey is just a nickname my brother would call me when he was just a youngun and it's always stuck with my family and family friends. And obviously I'm not married so my url couldn't be like Ashleyandsoandso.blogspot.com. I mean lets get real here.

Marriage! It's so funny you would bring that up because I was just about to ask: Why aren't you married?

I don't know. Why aren't you dead? Seriously the next person that asks me that is going to get kicked in the crotch. Maybe I'll just start saying it's because my boyfriend and I are swingers, and if you're a swinger that means you're immoral, and if you're immoral, you can't go to the temple. And then when people are reading the Leader or the HJ and see that you're not going through the temple, you're talked about behind your back and you're an outcast to society. So I'm not married because I swing. So, newsflash to you! If it doesn't concern you, mind your own business.

Ok psycho. Can you even be a swinger if you're not married? And if your life doesn't concern other people, why are you starting a blog? And why are you even doing this interview? Aren't interviews all about asking questions that aren't other peoples business?

Quit trying to contradict ourselves! Just ask another question.

Ok, what's your sign baby?

I'm a taurus which means I can be stubborn, but I'm also easygoing and not one to pick a fight. I'm also not fond of change and I prefer comfortable, creative settings and objects. Oh yeah and you shouldn't cross me or the wrath will be known... no big whoop right? I bet this is getting boring... are you done yet?

Hold on let's jump to something more interesting, oh here's an FAQ. Just how big are your boobs now, and are they real?

Wow, interestingly enough I get that question asked about as much as the marriage one. A guy that had my phone number text me once and said "girl, what size is your chest?" And I gave him a piece of my mind. Thank goodness for text messaging or I probably wouldn't have had the guts to say anything. Then I dumped a bottle of hand sanitizer on my phone. Anyway in the words of the Seinfeld lady "They're real and they're spectacular" Size is not a fact that needs to be called to anyones attention. Just know that I haven't found a decent fitting swimming suit for 2 years and they're spectacular enough to make my back hurt. Don't be jealous.

I'm not. I think they make you look fat.

Too true, too true. So much for sucking in. Well I think I'm done with questions for today. If anyone else has any that they would like me to answer feel free to ask and Happy Stalking!